Comments We’ve Heard About Long Distance Relationships

Long distance relationships, to the eyes of some, may seem deceiving/doubtful, and a relationship that is automatically doom to fail. The fact of this is that there is still skepticism surrounding the validity of them. This could be why some of us may feel that breaking the news to friends and family about being in a long distance relationship could have been or may be difficult and quite an awkward or draining situation.

It sure takes a great amount of courage to do this, more when we are aware that although this can bring a relief to us, it can potentially be a subject of criticism and comments out of place. Of course there may be people who will always support our decisions, no questions asked. Therefore, the comments we’ve heard while being in a long distance relationship may, in some cases, vary.

 

“I’m a guy, I have my necessities therefore I would not be able to do it”

Necessities? Being in a relationship is not only about necessities either for just men and/or women. Of course there are “down sides” of being in a long distance relationship, and for the majority of us, the major one could be physical contact. Yet, it takes much more than physical contact to have, what can be considered, a successful relationship. Fortunately, this is something that as long distance lovers, we are able to learn and exercise on an everyday basis.

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“Where you looking for a relationship online?”

Maybe, maybe not. This is an answer that varies among people, and it’s completely acceptable! From my own experience and from what I’ve seen and heard, it simply happens. Whether or not you went looking for an online relationship with someone from abroad is completely your decision. Maybe it was totally unexpected and unplanned but you’re thankful it happened. Sometimes a conversation with somebody online/app/social media turns into much more than a simple random chat with a stranger. Case might be you might’ve been looking for a friend, someone to talk to, to meet someone romantically, etc. and all motives are okay, if they led you to meet someone that may have changed you for the better, even in the most remotely way possible.

“A love from distance is a love of 3 and maybe even 4”

Cheating. This may be a case that could be implied with such words, or similar ones. Truth is no relationship is safe from this, cheating happens everyday whether there are hundreds or thousands of miles in between two individuals or whether you live 5 minutes away from your significant other. I believe that all that matters is the trust that exists in the relationship. At the end of the day, it is there are only two people that make a couple.

“I’m sure you can find somebody here whom you can date without having to go through that distance struggle”

Maybe this is true and can certainly happen, but if dating somebody you truly care for, depended on proximity, well I would be doomed to never finding this special person, and maybe I wouldn’t be the only one. Yet, fortunately this is not the case, and if we are in a relationship with someone that lives far away from us, it is not because we are a fan of the distance but because we fell for an individual who is very special to us. Proximity has nothing to do with the feelings we have for someone, the connection and special bond a couple has.

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“How do you know if this person is real/is not lying or hiding things to you about who he really is?”

Valid point. Our significant other may not be physically with us as we might like, but the quality time that is spent texting, talking and calling somewhat makes up for not being able to be together. With that being said, a person doesn’t necessarily needs to be in front of you in order for you to get to know them. Hours and hours in which both lives are intertwined help immensely when getting to know someone if this is the only possible way. My Aussie and I have shared so much about our persona and life events in the past 23 months (19 months as a couple), and counting, that it feels so natural and right to do so. True, he and I may not know each other 100%, but my question is: who really does?

These are some of the comments I’ve “collected” through my ongoing journey of my long distance relationship. A few of these are from family members that have been in successful and unsuccessful long distance relationships. Now, what are some of the comments you’ve encountered or comments that someone you know has encountered about long distance relationships? I encourage you to share them on the comment section.

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20 comments

  1. I’m in a long distance realtionship since 6 months. I live in Sweden and my boyfriend lives in Spain. We talk almost every day on webcam and we’re determined to make this work. I think it’s difficult for people who haven’t had the experience of meeting real love on internet, to understand. I get comments too. But my boyfriend is closer to me than anyone in my life is,except from my children. To be close has nothing to do with distance. You can live in the same house as a person and still it’s miles of emotional distance between you and that person. You can live a life with someone without never getting close. And you can meet someone online who gets to know you better than anyone and that are closer to you than anyone. I wish you and your aussie all the best!! I’m sure you will make it!

    Liked by 5 people

    • Hello, I think it’s great that you both are determined because you know exactly what you want and are willing to work to achieve it. I believe determination is an essential part of a long distance relationship because apart from all the elements a relationship should have to work out long distance relationship require more effort from both parts to be successful. It is completely true what you mention, proximity doesn’t determine how well you are able to get to know a person at a more intimate level where you are not afraid to open up to someone. I also have to agree with the fact that it is rare for people who have never been close to a situation as such to fully understand the legitimacy of ldrs. Thank youfor sharing your experience and your kind words. I wish you both the very best! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • I don’t think I have heard the first one before, or at least directed at me or us. Although I may see why people would think that way, I personally wouldn’t be able to like an individual from the lack of time we get to spend time together or if I didn’t know much of that person. I think that what makes me feel stronger feelings is by how much we really get to know each other, and I think that’s what happens in long distance relationships, you get to know a person more deeply. It’s great that you don’t let what other say dictate on how you and your significant other continue with your relationship and are protective of what you have.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Long distance relationships takes a lot of commitment and trust between couples. Example, if you and I were in a long distant relationship😂 think of the seas you’ll have to cross to reach me. However, if we persevere and manage till we reach the next step, that’s when will know we’re destined😂😂😂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. The worst comment I got about my girlfriend was.. “Are you sure she talks to you only? You dont even get to see her daily! She might be involved with some other guy over there”
    Trust matters a lot in these relationships and yes, if She’s going to cheat, she will. No matter where she lives or how far we are physically from each other.

    Liked by 3 people

    • I think that is one of the worst comments and misconceptions that exist about long distance relationships. Unfortunately, although this might happen in some cases, reality is, like you mentioned, this may actually happen in relationships in general, not just long distance relationships. I don’t think that distance plays big part on whether a person cheats or not if there is trust and communication, like you said, it depends on the person regardless of his/her proximity to the significant other.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. It’s right Fernanda. Being in a relationship doesn’t only demand physical intimacy but emotional intimacy too. And, talking about cheating, well it happens even in next door relationships unless of course both partners are true to each other.

    Liked by 1 person

    • That is so right, Rajat. A relationship does not sustain itself with only physical intimacy, there is much more to making a relationship successful. Somehow when it comes to long distance relationships being put in the spotlight, people forget about that point you mentioned, cheating is prone to happen in a relationship where people live 10 minutes away from each other and where there’s hundreds if not thousands of miles in between two beings. Unfaithfulness doesn’t discriminate, which is why, like you stated, being true to each other is important. Thank you for your input. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Hey Fernanda, these are so true! I’m happy in my long distance relationship at the moment but I have heard a fair share of these unsolicited judgmental remarks. I found it rather hilarious when a friend of mine asked me with a huge surprise if my partner and I had never ever cheated on each other in spite of our long distance struggle! I didn’t even know what to say in response and just blurted out laughing 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hello Aishwarya,
      It is unfortunate to hear what you correctly mention are sometimes unsolicited comments or judgmental remarks such as implying that cheating is bound to happen in ldrs. Reality of it all is that cheating can occur in any form of romantic relationship, yet there is still a misconception that ldrs are not real and one or both people in the relationship are bound to be unfaithful. I think that regardless of comments that may come your way, as long as you are happy and know the meaning of what you both have, comments like such are only an outside opinion.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Hullo. I try to write about love and it’d be honor if you read my blog sometime. I highly appreciate your posts about relationships just like this one. I too am in a long distance relationship with the most wonderful woman ever, and I am really happy.

    Liked by 1 person

      • Yes, we’re indeed very happy. I get to meet her only once every year, and its just for like 3 days or something, and even then we’re in front of family, so we cant actually hang out together and cant even talk. We just pass eye contacts and silent messages. We’ve been together for 3 years now.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Wow, that is amazing! Props to both of you for fighting against the distance for each other and what you both have. I think it’s great that you are able to visit each other. Even if it’s for a few days, you both need to have time for each other.

        Like

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